Worst Christmas lyrics?

My buddy Gordon Zaft must have been listening to some Holiday Hits on the radio, 'cause over on his Facebook page he quoted Karen Carpenter's line from Merry Christmas Darling: the "logs on the fire fill me with desire".

Now, that has to be one of the worst lyric lines from any so-called "Christmas song" -- in a song full of saccharine lyrics. (And since I have all the original Carpenters albums somewhere here on the original cassettes, I should know.)

But perhaps you know Christmas songs with triter and ickier lyrics than those! Post away!