Invest in us! Our stock price has been sagging, but we've got a new way to get into federally funded re$earch! We'll be willing to use our new technique in the future and avoid killing any embryonic people. At least on federally funded projects.
Oh, sorry: was there some confusion? We haven't really stopped killing embryonic human beings yet; not while we were trying out our new method, but we could! If there's money in it! And we think it'll be far less deadly than what we do now!
Oh, and: sorry if anyone lost money over that false impression people got from our publicity article. Oops!
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