Hats off to Mrs. MacFarlane

| 41 Comments

Via Vociferous Yawpings: Bai MacFarlane is fighting the divorce in court, God bless her.

The story of how the couple met isn't on his web site CatholiCity any more, but Google's cache still has it.

It's hard to imagine these two very public Catholics being eligible for a declaration of nullity, and I presume Mrs. MacF. will make the case against that too if it comes up.

What the heck went wrong?

41 Comments

Can you provide a little more context, Richard? I don't know these folks.

"Bud" MacFarlane is the head of Catholicity.com and the Mary Foundation which is the largest producer of CDs and tapes like Scott Hahn's conversion.

He is also the author of several novels which are not particularly well written but have interesting characters living in the context of the Catholic faith.

This event is truly surprising and sad.

Apparently Mrs. MacFarlane co-developed CatholiCity in her capacity as systems engineer.

First Randall Terry, now this?

This is disturbing.

RC, hate to disappoint, but a good canon lawyer can get an annulment on just about any marriage. Some brag about it. And American diocesan tribunals grant somewhere around 90%-95% of the petitions.

The diocese doesn't grant annulments -- that's the prerogative of the Pope.

My husband used to be our parish receptionist, and he told me that our priest did not allow all annulment applications through. I think the only ones he let go to the diocese were those involving the Pauline and the Petrine principles.

Eric,

I am astounded that Pope John Paul II, at such an advanced age, and while suffering from Parkinsons, has the patience to listen to all two gazillion annulment cases that come from America every year. It is amazing that he has the time and energy to do anything else.

Seriously, I think you are quibbling. Unless the case is appealed to the Roman Rota (and the appeal is heard), the tribunal's decision stands, doesn't it?

please tell me this is a joke of some kind. When I first read how they met and ended up married, I was touched.

I don't suppose this can be some kind of stunt and all will work out in the end??? yea- didn't think so.

It is very sad. Bai seems remarkable poised considering.

I just visited the Catholicity website and noted that Bud MacFarlane's name is no where to be seen. Even the description of his books don't mention his name. I don't know if he has vanished from Catholicity but he's vanished from the masthead.

If they gave it time, they might be able to grow into something better. I've seen a couple marriages within a millimeter of divorce recover and do very well - but it takes years to let go of idealization and embrace the reality of the another.

A priest friend of mine, who sits on the diocesan tribunal, called to correct my statement. I am appropriately humbled. However, I meant that declarations of nullity between baptized Christians (which is what we're talking about here) is the prerogative of the Holy See. Pauline and Petrine declarations can be dispensed at the local level.

Coward, I have here my promotion warrant for staff sergeant. The Commandant of the Marine Corps issued it. Did he sit at his desk in Henderson Hall and review my records, then authorize my elevation in rank? No, he delegated it to others. Same thing with the Pope: any annulment must be issued by his delegated authority.

I think you're misunderstanding the nature of the tribunal. When it is acting on behalf of the Holy See, the tribunal does not work for the local ordinary (bishop), it works for the Holy Father. The bishop himself cannot interfere in its operations. When I was working at the chancery, the network administrator had to set up an entirely separate LAN and file server for the tribunal, because what they did was technically separate from the diocese.

I'd be grateful to Pete Vere if he were to elaborate or correct anything on this thread.

Eric,

From my understanding of the operating of the tribunal that it is indeed part of the diocese. Each diocese has its own tribunal that anyone in that diocese can petition when matters of canon law have been violated (as evidenced by Fr. Paul in Dallas who filed a complaint against bishop Grahmann to remain pastor of Blessed Sacrament.) While the bishop cannot directly interfere, it is he and the pastoral council that appoints priests as judges of the tribunal. Should a case be appealed, it them goes to the Metropolitan's tribunal, the court of first appeal. Eventually it could reach the Roman Rota. Also from my understand, the Pauline and Petrine privilege is reserved to the Pope, as only the Pope can dispense a married man to receive Holy Orders, as is the case with the Petrine privilege. Pete, please correct me if I am wrong or clarify.

I wasn't saying that the tribunal wasn't part of the diocese, merely that it works as an "appellate court" for Rome.

Sherry, I'm seeing Bud's name all over the Web site, including this ironic quotation:

"Bud Macfarlane Sr. and Dr. Robert McDonald give a life-changing, sometimes shocking two-part presentation on the ultimate secret to raising happy, healthy, and holy families...."

What happened first with Randall Terry?

I'm very sad for the Macfarlane family. We should all pray for them.

I am wandering if the focus on apparitions may have caused a problem. By this, I mean that a spiritually based on private revelations that may or may not be approved can lead to dismay and poor discernment in other areas of life.

Brendan, I really don't think that had much to do with it. It seems to me that the Macfarlanes were also devoted to those elements of the Catholic Faith that were not private revelation: the Eucharist, for instance, and reparational fasting.

I think this is simply a case of Satan getting under their skin. He's good at that.

I am curious as to how she expected to fight the divorce. Sadly, I can't imagine a state in the country where if one spouse wants a divorce, there is a thing that the other spouse can do.
Even, more sad, I think Tom is exactly right about the annullment situation.

Folks... a good canon lawyer cannot always get an annulment. There is the facts. As an aside, a good canon lawyer can stop an annulment if the facts are weak.

Secondly, having actually spent three years in Tribunal ministry in America, I feel the problem is not too many annulments but but too many invalid marriages being blessed. I can count on one hand the number of couples who didn't engage in premarital sex and use contraception. This is from doing thousands of cases. While not grounds in themselves, it points to where their hearts were going into the marriage.

Thirdly, there are several reasons why the rate is so high in America as opposed to the rest of the world. America is more conservative then Europe, so American Catholics still want annulments when their marriages fall apart. (Most European Catholics simply don't care). America is more liberal than Africa or Asia, however, so divorce is more rampant. (Meaning you are likely to see annulment applications come in.)

Additionally, about half our annulments involve couples who were never Catholic, but now one of the parties want to marry a Catholic or the couple want to become Catholic (think Marcus Grodi and his wife, the latter who was previously married for a brief period of time.)

Finally, American Tribunals are set up to run efficiently, unlike South America where it takes ages and ages.

Pete has many good things to say, but I will point out that the operative phrase in his first argument is "good canon lawyer." I also work at the tribunal, and there are those who see their mission as to grant an annulment however they can. Depends on whether the MacFarlanes' tribunal thinks similarly.

Has anybody recommended Retrouvaille to them yet?

I have seen Retrouvaille take the most hurtful relationships and turn them back into sacrament. What city are they in? There are Retrouvaille communities all over this country that can help.

Retrouvaille has a 85-95% success rate. For couples where both do the work, it has a 100% success rate.

Fr. Jeffrey Keyes, C.PP.S
Retrouvaille International Chaplain

Duh! Why didn't we think of that? I think they're near Cleveland.

Guys:

A bishop is the chief judge of the tribunal of his diocese. Operating on his behalf is a "judicial vicar." (The title "vicar" is for a standing representative, as in "vicar of Christ," eh?) Pete is right. Unless someone out there can tell me how many annulments is too many. I never hear a number from anybody, just a bunch of holier-than-thou twerps getting on their high-horse when a marriage fails. I know, 'cuz I used to be one. Then it happened to me. Wanna guess who's next?

Every husband who reads this today, bring your wife flowers tonight, for no reason. Consider it an act of reparation for the husbands who don't do it often enough.

I used to be one of those too.

I thought Bud MacFarlane's wife's name was Kristi TePas (Bai is her nickname). I don't know where Marie came from. This story is extremely upsetting to me - I cannot believe that Bud MacFarlane would ever consider divorce. He must be temporarily out of his mind. Yes, Satan is at work here. God bless Bai -- may she and the kids overcome this awful scandal, and may Bud find his senses. Big prayers going up for the MacFarlane family -- please join me!

Someone in the legal profession looked up the docket(s) and found that Mrs. MacF filed for divorce FIRST, and that Mr MacF dodged the summons several times before accepting. This info doesn't mesh with the story the wife is publically airing. Explanations??

Interesting. On the other hand, it's April 1. Want to cite a source for this info?

That post about Bai being the one to file for divorce is false. Here is how the divorce documents read. Note BUD is the Plaintiff:

Case Number: DR-03-294327
Case Title: WILLIAM N. MACFARLANE vs. MARIE CHRISTINE MACFARLANE

PLAINTIFF(1) WILLIAM N. MACFARLANE
19524 CENTER RIDGE ROAD SUITE 4
FAIRVIEW PARK, OH 44126-0000

DEFENDANT(1) MARIE CHRISTINE MACFARLANE
29737 SCHWARTZ ROAD
WESTLAKE, OH 44145-0000

I am a friend of Bai Macfarlane and I can tell you that she did not file for divorce and is fighting for her marriage, her children, and for her's husbands soul. She is a very good woman who was blindsided but is putting up the fight of her life. Please be careful about falsehoods and gossip. Please prayer that God grant her peace and strength and her husband a revelation.

My husband just brought home the court docket (sp?) which shows that she filed first and that he tried to dodge the summons several times. Her filing has an earlier number. Since this doesn't seem to jibe with her letters on the subject, I think we should probably not be too quick to lay the situation at Bud's feet. I don't know what is going on and will pray of course. This is so sad for the entire body of Christ. Satan is having a field day here.

From the Cuyahoga County Court system, it seems both of them filed cases for legal separation on the same day (8/12/03) -- hers first (the docket numbers differ by 5).

In mid-December, she withdrew her claim and moved for reconciliation. The court dismissed both cases on 12/30, but left both parties free to file again.
On 2/3/04 the court recorded Mr. MacFarland's amended complaint seeking a divorce.

The two cases are
DR-03-294322 and
DR-03-294327

The records search page is at
http://cpdocket.cuyahoga.oh.us/cjisjs/servlet/cjis.urd/run/cmsw102.display

I checked the court records but I think you'll find Bai filed for legal separation (is this the same as divorce?). This might be a move advised by her lawyer so she could take action such as separating her assets and credit cards, etc. Otherwise if one party goes nuts and spends a load of money they could burden the other party with a load of debt. The date of the filing in August would suggest this was a legal safety move to protect her and her childrens assets.

Regarding the discussion about who filed first in the B&B case, just know that a desparate partner will seek out the only help os which she/he knows in our civil system and that's a LAWYER, and a lawyer will very quickly confuse and misinform a frightened spouse So, please do not try to untangle this ugly mess of information because it is full of contamination of the "facts" from a sinisterly-operating system that has only one objective: to destroy a marriage. The civil system offers NO alternative to divorce. Once you set foot in a lawyer's office (either spouse) you are put on a conveyor belt to divorce!

why don't you all worry about your own souls and let these two every day people live out thier own lives? How would you like your personal problems bantered about?

Please pray for the restoration of our marriage ane family.

Timothy, Christina, and
Colin have been forced apart for two years this Easter. We have already lost the home, and
one of us keeps busy so you don't have to watch our little four year old boy suffer.
The courts are trying to force a divorce, and in doing so demand ourtagious child support amounts from a man they themselves lost his job of 20 years. Now they took his driver's licence away so he cannot work, or see his son. These are the actions they call protecting marriage and family.
Please voice your opionion, and help this wonderful little boy go home to his family!

To hope who commented above:

why don't you all worry about your own souls and let these two every day people live out thier own lives? How would you like your personal problems bantered about?

Because:

1. They have gone public with it themselves.

2. Because they both ran a Catholic apostolate worrying about "our souls" for many years, telling us how to be better Catholics and undertake fasting and penance to have a better marriage and therefore such an event gives rise to grave public scandal.

I wouldn't like to have my personal problems bantered about, but having put myself in such a public position I would not be surprised if they were.

As a newlywed and a new Catholic who was ushered into the faith by Catholicity's materials, this is very sad news indeed. Just this morning I was listening to Bai's clear, strong voice on the Scott Hahn conversion tape . . .

No, they'll never get back together, not after all this ridiculous "petitioning" and after everyone has embarrassed the family and children using the media.

I know they were heavily into NFP which CAN be another form of contraception and is only suppose to be used under EXTREME circumstances, ie living in a mud hut.

Now that Bai has started her own blog at http://matrimony.stblogs.org , you can get her thoughts straight from the source.

What? Who?

On life and living in communion with the Catholic Church.

Richard Chonak

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