I say it’s my birthday…and it’s all downhill from here

Today is my birthday, a day I share with Albert Einstein and Lawrence Welk (who was a good Catholic, incidently, and hated contemporary church music.) According to the Angelic Doctor, since I am now 33, I have reached my peak:

All will rise in the condition of perfect age, which is of thirty-two or thirty-three years. This is because all who were not yet arrived at this age, did not possess this perfect age, and the old had already lost it. Hence, youths and children will be given what they lack, and what the aged once had will be restored to them….

Although elsewhere, he writes that the age of 30 is the perfect age:

Christ was fittingly baptized in His thirtieth year. First, because Christ was baptized as though for the reason that He was about forthwith to begin to teach and preach: for which purpose perfect age is required, such as is the age of thirty. Thus we read (Gn. 41:46) that “Joseph was thirty” years old when he undertook the government of Egypt. In like manner we read (2 Kgs. 5:4) that “David was thirty years old when he began to reign.” Again, Ezechiel began to prophesy in “his thirtieth year,” as we read Ezech. 1:1.

Either way, it’s all downhill from here. And if this is how I’m supposed to look at the Resurrection and for all eternity…well, I’m definitely going to lose a few more pounds, and get a better haircut.

15 comments

  1. Congrats, but you’re still two years shy of being able to become a bishop (c. 378.1), which I suspect your wife would probably object to anyway…

  2. Yup…downhill…faster and faster!! Many happy returns….just think in three years you could run for US President…
    I’m favoring Eric for the bottom of the Republican ticket in 2008, him having the backing of the CIA and all.
    Eric,
    Happy birthday!

  3. I think the CIA would be against an Eric candidacy on account of it might blow his cover for his secret assassination missions to the Dominican Republic and his secret payments in Swiss francs and whatnot. It’s kinda like nobody knows who the head of Mossad is until after he retires.

  4. Victor,
    That’s what they want you to think. You’re forgetting about hiding things in plain view. Under that theory, Eric would be least likely to be exposed as a secret CIA assassin bent on depopulating the Dominican Republic if he were on the ticket. Besides, neither Eric nor the CIA doesn’t actually intend for the Republicans to win in 2008. They need Hillary to win so that they can launch a coup and turn America into a monarchical espiocracy.

  5. Ah but it;s worse than you think: you’re that much closer to death. Feel better now? :) Sorry, the cynic in me and besides I’m almost 3 years closer myself. Don’t fret over it’s not bad. Happy Birthday and God bless!!!

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