Category: Odds & Ends

So we are all sedevacantists now!
(Sigh.)
Not only will Pope John Paul’s successor have a difficult act to follow, the papacy itself has been made into a bigger job by the long-vigorous and much-traveled polyglot Pope.

Section 1. The President shall have the authority to designate certain legal proceedings as “celebrity trials.” These celebrity trials shall be known from the public attention they receive, and the nonexistent impact they have on the Nation’s day-to-day life.
Section 2. The provisions of the First Amendment to the Constitution regarding these trials shall be considered null and void.
Section 3. The President shall direct the law enforcement agencies to suppress any publication or broadcast mentioning these celebrity trials. Any citizen attempting to publicize these trials shall be displayed in a public place with shackles and a sign reading “I find pleasure in humiliating others.”
Section 4. No one shall ever mention Michael Jackson of Santa Barbara, California, ever again. No, not even his family.

Does anyone else get Bernie Mac and Cedric the Entertainer confused?

Modern public speaking is a dessicated, joyless art, and it’s probably unfair to single out one public speaker for special criticism. But I think Senator Harry Reid of Nevada can take it. Reid, who for some reason is the Senate minority leader, gave one of the most pathetic speeches I’ve seen in a long time. When giving a TV speech, Tom Daschle always sounded like a sex criminal denying his crimes, but Reid makes Daschle sound as entertaining as Chris Rock. His joke about a kid from his hometown of Searchlight was as flat as a pancake. It got worse from there.

You know, today is Groundhog Day. And what we saw and heard tonight was a little like the movie “Groundhog Day” — the same old ideology that we’ve heard before, over and over and over again. We can do better.

Funny, I had just finished telling my wife something similar: that Harry Reid could have given the same speech 10, 15, even 20 years ago. In fact, I remember some grumpy Democrat in 1988 criticizing Reagan’s speech for containing “ideology.” He didn’t mention “Groundhog Day,” probably because the movie was still several years in the future. But otherwise, I’m pretty sure it was the same speech.
He goes on:

Will we be able to tell young people, like Devon back in Searchlight, that America is still the land of the open road and that you can travel that open road to the place of your choice?

This came right after Reid dumped on the idea of letting people keep some of their own Social Security money. Because to the Democrats, “the open road” and its destination must be provided by the government, and any threat to government confiscation of wealth must be attacked.

Bethlehem’s inns, which had no vacancies for the birth of Jesus about 2,000 years ago, are largely empty this Christmas season, according to a United Nations report that found tourism to the West Bank town has fallen 92 percent in the past four years.