Last June, noted moralist Al “What Am I Famous For, Exactly?” Franken sent a letter to Attorney General John “Hotpants” Ashcroft, asking him for the story of how he abstained from sex when he (Ashcroft) was young. Using Harvard stationery, Franken wrote that he had already received similar stories from other prominent Republicans.
Needless to say, Franken wasn’t telling the truth, and he’s issued an apology for his lame attempt at humor. He also misused the stationery, because he has no connection with the Harvard center on the letterhead, though he was a fellow last spring in the Kennedy School of Government. (Savor that fact for a moment: a mediocre comedian was a fellow at the Kennedy School. I’d love to know when it will bestow the honor upon P.J. O’Rourke.)
Aside: why do liberals hate John Ashcroft so intensely? At this point in her tenure, Janet Reno had already killed half as many Americans as Saddam Hussein did in the whole Gulf War, yet they defended her. Their accusations boil down to his preference for a flavor of religion they don’t like, evangelical Christianity, and prosecuting laws they don’t like, such as the Patriot Act. I checked, and it’s still legal to practice any religion you like in the U.S. (this ain’t Canada yet), and the Patriot Act was passed by 98 out of 100 Senators, including dangerous right-wing extremists such as Kennedy, Daschle, and the late Paul Wellstone. This obsession with Ashcroft says more about his critics than it does about him.
One senses that Al Franken’s own teenage abstinence story has less to do with self-restraint than with the good taste of the girls where he grew up. His own abstinence was thus thrust upon him, so to speak, unless I’m wrong and the girls he hung around with were mentally unstable and/or acutely nearsighted.
The truest statement in the original letter to Ashcroft: “Kids can sense a phony a mile away.” Adults can too, Al!
UPDATE: The Washington Post‘s Howard Kurtz wrote a story about Franken’s tome. Kurtz, who covers the journalism beat and is one of the Post‘s best writers, calls it “a bit of a screed,” and “strident.” Franken comes off as a nasty jerk, a slightly slimmer Michael Moore.
I didn’t know that he challenged Rich Lowry to a fistfight, and that Lowry turned him down. The next time Al comes to Washington, I’m going to see if I can get him to challenge me — please, Al, please! I’m just as conservative as Rich! And I work for a conservative publication that you hate, just like him!
The clinching line at the end: “First of all, I’m funny….And I don’t lie.” But you admitted you lied, buddy, and to the United States attorney general…which Al Franken are we supposed to believe?
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Franken was most sorry that he misused the stationery — the lesser offense — not that he told a direct lie. Apparently a sin against liberal Harvard evokes more regret from him than a sin against conservative Christian Republicans.
And this poseur has the nerve to write a book about “lying liars” in the media!
Almost 24 hours and Pete still hasn’t said anything about tweaking Canada’s nose in this post….
It’s incredibly funny that the only thing you could hold up to show Al is a liar was that satirical letter sent to various conservatives. Why don’t ya go ask Anne Coulter how old she is? And I’d really like to see those two Peabody Awards that Sean H. claims to have gotten! hehehe
Al Frankin is a stupid Communist, and someone should kill him.
With regards to Iraq, We should just drop a neutron bomb (which kills people but lets the buildings stand). We need to make Iraq safer for our liberation efforts. Sadaam had the Muslims under control.
We let Sadaam attack Iran with weapons we sold to him, which was fine. We should have let Sadaam conquer Kuwait, then we could have bombed Kuwait and Iraq back to the stone age, then taken their oil.
It is obviously Bush’s plan to take the oil, but he is doing it in much too civilized a manner. We SHOULD control the oil in the Middle East because they are too fanatical and crazy to control it, and if that means taking their lives, so be it.
The white man needs to re-assert his authority in all parts of the world, and re-establish his colonial rule because the other peoples of the world are just not civilized. Look at Africa. Without the white man to run things, it is total chaos. Same thing in Iraq. So don’t say we shouldn’t have gone there. They need us to make it a civilized country!
Just finished the Franken screed. The book was neither entertaining nor informative. Indeed, though the book purports to blow the whistle on lies from the right, the lies in the name of entertainment really detract from important message that needs to be told. Near the end, the book says that right has to get out its message by lying, so the author has to get his message out by entertaining. That makes no sense.
Maybe I’m overly sensitive, but I’d like to think I am interested in the truth willing to consider the evidence, and capable of drawing conclusions from the evidence without having to be entertained by a clown. I would have preferred direct access to proof of the lies, cross-indexed by subject and liar, and supported with footnotes and a CD reproducing the evidence.
The stationary is not the point. There is a bigger problem here: Franken attempts to mix clowing with serious serious matters. It is water and oil. Franken’s approach pisses off the right, and discredits the message of the left (or, more accurately, the anti-right).
Did you really think that Al Franken expected anybody with an ounce of intellegence to take seriously his claim that he was given “wonderful testimony” regarding abstinence from Tommy Thomson, Bill Bennett, Ari Fleischer, Rick Santorum, AND Condoleeza Rice? You do know he has a reputation as a wiseguy comedian, don’t you?
Franken is a fool and a hypocrite! He sued to stop the publication of a book called “Al Franken is a Bucktoothed Moron” a spoof of his book ‘Rush Limbaugh is a big fat idiot’
In the bum’s latest book, he steals the trademarked term “Fair and Balanced” and parodied Bill O’Reilly’s book cover – this is the typical elitist Do-as-I-say attitude that liberals have. He obviously feels he is exempt from his own rules!
I surfed onto this site and find it outrageous and disgusting that “Catholic Light” features a aggressive propagandistic pieces maliciously attacking someone who tried to satirically expose Limbaugh: a professional malicious, morally bankrupt bigot, most noted for racism, disconcern for the underprivledged, aggressive homophobia, non-analytical militarism, etc, etc, etc.
So are these things now “Catholic Virtues”? Has the Church devolved to this state??? Or is the community propping itself as its “devoted spokespersons” really nothing more than a disingenuous haven for petty, arrogant, anti-Christian, reactionary bigots? Hmmm… Somebody’s wearing no clothes here.
Hey Jim K: awwwww, how cuuute! You’re standing up for your buddy Al! But who made YOU the arbiter of morality? Who gave YOU the right to judge anyone? You slam Limbaugh for his opinions, and yet your inflammatory vitriol shows your hypocrisy. Take the high road, buddy, if you’re so holier-than-thou. Dismissed.
People need to realize how smart Bush and Chaney really are. They supported our defense industry by using bombs and planes to level Iraq, then will use good old American industries to rebuild Iraq! It’s brilliant! Now companies like Haliburton and Betchtel can create American jobs and contrary to the liberal press reports, the American people won’t have to pay. Bush will use Iraq’s own oil to pay for the reconstruction! It’s a free boost for the economy!
Maybe it cost a few lives, but fortunately it was mostly Iraqui lives, which don’t count anyway. Bush needs to start a major ‘shock and awe’ campaign against the Muslims in Iraq so that we can make it a US territory, and use it to supply our oil needs. These uncivilzed countries need Western countries to govern them, and right now we are the strongest Western country.
Jeff, you spelled Cheney wrong, and I’m glad you recognize how civilized America is, especially when compared to the Iraq Saddam was running.
I’m certain that this left wing – right wing dialogue isn’t doing our country any good. As for Jeff Jazkoz remarks about Iraqi lives lost not counting: What kind of a Catholic/Christian are you anyway? Do you think JPII or Jesus would condone that kind of thought.
“Catholic Light”??! This forum smacks of Nazi-ism and being a totalitarian bully pulpit.
May God and our Lord Jesus help you find your way in life. I’ll pray for you and our country to rid us of this vitiolic (both right and left) dialogue.
Shame on you.
al franken is a duschebag. to say the least, he in fact is a liar. every word that spews out of his mouth is twisted and mangled, none the less humorless. the only thing funny about him is how he thinks that he holds a valid place in politics. i guess i can’t blame him. he’s getting more laughs now with his wild and wacky political views than he ever did with his tasteless humor. everyone needs to get attention somehow
Has anyone come up with a good list of errors and lies in Franken’s latest book? I’ve a couple of lefties among my friends who are swayed by the idea that he had “14 Harvard researchers” involved in this project. -Like somehow that makes it more credible. I’d love to see anything out there that is a deconstruction of this work. Thanks!
Mr. Jazkoz,
How do you get from Al Frankin’s book, to Iraq, then to the superiority of white people all in 150 words? You come from a country with a great wealth of resources where people don’t have to fight to the death to survive. Tossing the people of Iraq in with their accidental “leader” is nonsensical. You say the Arabs are too fanatical and crazy to control their oil, so whe should kill them all and take it? Hello? What good are you if all you want to do is kill others who are different than you and steal their posessions? Where is the moral high-ground in your argument that you seem to feel? You belong in the 19th century.
“But who made YOU the arbiter of morality? Who gave YOU the right to judge anyone?”
Who made you the arbiter of morality, or the right to judge anyone?
For one thing, Rush Limbaugh often blamed drug addictions on the addicted, claiming that they should be “sent up,” all the while feeding his own drug addiction. That’s not very moral from my perspective, and I hope it isn’t from yours.
Wow.. kill? In general people on the left do a lot more loving than hating. I don’t hate bush or ashcroft.. however I do think they are better suited to another line of work. Peace.
btw killing is not very Christ like. What brand of Catholicism is this?!!!! You should take the word Catholic out of the title really.
Thanks, Brian, for pointing out the “killing” remarks above. They certainly are not proper here.
I’ve never heard of this Mr. Jazkoz before, so you can rest assured his comment has nothing to do with the authors of the Catholic Light web site.
My guess is that he doesn’t really believe in the repugnant and immoral suggestions in his comment. I think he’s trying to mock the supporters of the Iraq war by making stupid declarations while posing as a war supporter.
Al Franken’s book is packed with lies, people. I just finished it…and now I have to go back to buying toilet paper. Check out frankenlies.com for a mere sample of the voluminous lies within the book. Based on the title, I thought I was buying his autobiography. How many white, Harvard researchers does it take to foist a book of shit upon a gullible, left wing public? Apparently just 14…plus one moron to put his ugly face on the cover.