My last word on the Fugitive unless something good happens
I sincerely appreciate all the comments we’ve received in the past few days over this issue with the Fugitive. I appreciate most of all your prayers for her because I know she needs them. I can’t thank you enough. Please keep them coming, she needs them. Fr. James Poumade was kind enough to offer his perspective via Eric. Father, you have a standing invitation to join the Catholic Light team any time you wish. You presence would not only be welcomed, it would be an objective ontological improvement to our content. We might even be able to block access from the Chancery in Arlington if that would help!
After thinking quite a bit about this I realized that in telling her not to receive Communion I had two principal motivators: first, I didn’t want to do anything, by action or inaction, that would dishonor our Lord. Second, I didn’t want her to do anything that would be bad for her soul. I thought about how to advise her not to receive Communion when she mentioned her desire to go to Mass a few days earlier, and I honestly believed she would accept my words because of the trust we shared. In saying what I did I stepped on a emotional landmine. It has cost us our friendship, which I deeply regret, and it might cost even more. She may never set foot in a Catholic church again. Perhaps she might do so after this has incident has receded from her memory. I can’t say. She may remember and be drawn to the peace she spoke of when she was quiet before the Blessed Sacrament. She has told me that she went to the chapel of a church near her home rather regularly and found solace there. “It’s because God is there,” I said. “In body, blood, soul, and divinity.” I remember her nodding as if she was accepting that but didn’t fully understand it. She told me she wanted to go to Mass because she was looking for answers. I should have said, “You’ll find the answer there.” The answer, as Peter Kreeft has said in his book Making Sense out of Suffering is not an statement, but a person. The person of Jesus Christ is the answer to our brokeness, our restlessness, our suffering, our pain, our anxiety, and our sin. Why does God let bad things happen to good people? He let it all happen to Himself to show us He is the answer, to show us how deep His love is for us, and to show us the way home.
I thought she might be able to understand that in a small way if she just went to one Mass. I could have given her directions to the Church, let her go, and discussed it with her afterwards. I decided to go with her, to bring a missal so that she could read the prayers, and to support her. It didn’t happen the way I hoped it would. In fact, it has been an absolute disaster. I have lost a friend I valued very much. I think if everyone in the world knew her this would be a better place. She really is that special. If you could see her smile or hear her laugh you would understand. There is tremendous joy in her and so much pain, so much yearning for God. I really thought she might have been slowly turning a corner. Perhaps when this is all behind us she will. Perhaps all this pain is causing it. I don’t know. But I do trust in God who santicfies our suffering even when we don’t know the purpose of it or why we are enduring it.
Thanks again for your thoughts and prayers.